Self-love in Gender Identity, Transitioning

In my youth, sex roles; today, gender identity. While rich with LGBTQ+ in my families, I know so little. O Horvath generously walks us through their transition.

Proem

My father, a homosexual deep in the closet, died in 1972 at age 45 without coming out. I was 20. My dad’s brother never lived in the closet. When eight years old, I asked my uncle why he never married. ‘I’m homosexual.’ OK, no big deal. That explained it — good information to have. Growing up, I knew I was different. I never approached being a jock. I had friends who were girls. I never played ball with my dad. He got manicures. I didn’t understand masculine and feminine. In my first year of college in 1969, I took a course in Social Psychology of Sex Roles, opening my eyes to Women’s Lib, my place and gender identity and introducing me to long-lasting friends and partners. Gravitational pull? Although I didn’t yet know about my dad.

On September 11th (yes, that 9/11), I met Michelle Horvath at a conference in Reno, NV. We both lived in upstate NY, and since we couldn’t fly or rail home, we rented a car and drove home together. We bonded during those several days, became close friends. My boy, Mike Funk, died the following year. Michelle, her husband, and two children came to the memorial service. Several years ago, Michelle told me that O was…